Every day we hear another story of teenage recklessness. In the last month, four young adults died for no reason at all. Teenage violence is up. Concern regarding gangs and gang violence is on the rise.
So often, I fill this space with tragic stories of untapped potential that is wasted and teenagers on the cutting edge of doing great things but who are senselessly wiped out because of destructive decision-making.
Every mother's nightmare is that knock on the door in the middle of the night. You open the door and a somber police officer is standing in your doorway with devastating news.
The current landscape is spotted with so much devastation and loss due to recklessness, war and hate. It is refreshing when we hear stories of selflessness and generosity, especially coming from our young.
This spring break many of our high school coeds took leave to the islands and warmer climates for sun, surf and all night partying.
As so many students fled town, dozens of high school and college students from our area drove or flew to New Orleans to assist in the on-going Katrina relief effort.
These students could be anybody's kids. They didn't have a set profile. They were the white and the people of color; they were the rich and the not so rich. Their common bond was their desire to give something back to the community. They wanted to make a difference, or as one college coed said, "give a little instead of always taking."
While so many young people on break were kicking back and relaxing, these students were working twelve-hour days rebuilding homes and cleaning up debris in devastated neighborhoods.
When these young men and women returned, so many of them spoke about the desperate conditions and how so many people lost everything. They also spoke of feeling that they had received more than they have given.
They people they met were extraordinary. They were so grateful and appreciative of all the students' efforts. They could not get over how this group had given up a week of surf and sun for a week of real hard work.
On Good Friday of this year, about twenty young people from the North and South Shore participated in a rather extraordinary event. For a few years now, a Catholic youth minister from the South Shore has sponsored what his youth group calls a "midnight run" to the heart of New York City - Times Square.
The teens gathered around five o'clock at a South Shore church. They made peanut butter sandwiches and little goody bags. They had already collected blankets. After all their sandwiches and snack bags were made, they loaded up their vans and made the pilgrimage to Times Square.
In small chaperoned groups of three and four, the teens hit the midtown streets running - feeding the poor and the needy. They made sure everyone they saw who was cold received a blanket.
The teens were overwhelmed by what they saw. The homeless were young and old alike and everything in between. The were white and people of color. The numbers were staggering and the stories mind boggling, especially those of the teenagers.
Every teen who participated came home totally disarmed and grateful for the experience. They could not believe some of the stories they heard, the poverty they witnessed and the brokenness they experienced.
One of their stories in particular was most striking. One young man is a college student who is on the Dean's list at a local college. He is changing in positive ways every day. He is a young man who was born into privilege. He is quiet and does not let most people in, but came back from that midnight run and had to talk.
A little more than a year and a half ago, TK got into a lot of trouble because of destructive decision making. His parents bailed him out and got him the best lawyer money could buy. Still this young man was not open to changing. He was arrested a second time, but this time the District Attorney wanted to send him upstate for a very long time.
Nothing short of a miracle got TK into a long-term therapeutic recovery program. He will tell you that program changed his life.
He describes his old self as a spoiled, rich kid who was never held accountable for the choices he made. Finally, when faced with long-term incarceration, he began to see the light.
Finally, TK acknowledged all the hurt his reckless behavior was infecting on his family and close friends. On his first Sunday visit with his parents, he hugged them and said he was sorry for all he had done. He started to cry and his parents followed suit. They hugged him. His Mom said TK had not hugged them or cried since he was four years old.
Recognizing his addiction and taking positive steps toward recovery was the first step in TK's reclaiming his life. Now on visiting Sundays, he and his parents never run out of things to say. Before TK entered recovery, there were no conversations, only God-awful fights. He never told his parents he loved them.
As TK began reclaiming his life, he also discovered how selfish and self-centered he had become. The night of the midnight run, he spoke of how often he judged by externals and put people down. He said the people he ridiculed and put down were far more compassionate and caring then he was. They had nothing compared to where he came from, but on another level they had depth and substance, of which he felt he was in short supply.
TK talked to runaways still of high school age that were living on the streets of Manhattan, selling sex for food, money and a shower.
He came back from the midnight run very appreciative of the gifts and blessings he has, also realizing how wrong it is to judge a book by its' cover.
As adults, how often do we judge a book by its' cover: a person's color, economics, neighborhood, whether or not they live at home or elsewhere? How many of us have told our kids to turn their backs on kids with tattoos and body piecings or those who might be battling various addictions?
The list of prohibitions is endless. This is not a perfect world, nor are we who live here perfect. We might do better to model more inclusive, respectful behavior, especially if we want the next generation to treat us kindly when we need them.
